The Threadless Nut

One of my co-workers had the pleasure of experiencing a drive-by shooting near his home. While this on its own is certainly distressing, here’s the best part. This particular crime occurred on a dead-end street. So here’s how it went:

Vroooommmm…..

Bang Bang Bang…..

Vrooooo….

Kachunk…

Vroo…

Chasnick..

Vrooooommmm…..

You see they had to do a 3 point turn at the end of this cul-de-sac to get out. Somehow at the big meeting when various dashing criminals gathered to plan this job, probably at a casino in Monaco, not one of them thought that it might be a good idea to perform the multi-step direction reversing maneuver before loosing the deadly hail of lead. Either that, or the driver was taking his road test, wonder if he passed?

Mounting an EZ-Pass toll tag on a bike is always a bit of a challenge. When I bought my V-Strom the previous owner had put some really ugly black velcro on the windscreen to mount his EZ-Pass toll tag.

Not only is it ugly, you have to look at it all the time, and since it’s not the proper velcro, it isn’t even very secure. I wanted something a bit more polished and inconspicuous.  Looking around the bike, the tag fit right in between the windscreen and the mount down low. I thought about just using the correct velcro down there, but it would be difficult to attach and remove given the angles involved. I swap my tag between my truck and the bike, so it needs to be easy to move. I figured I needed some sort of pocket.

For the impatient, here’s the end result:

Here’s how to do it:

Look around your basement and find a large black plastic container. Mine was actually for gunpowder, but any reasonably stiff, but flexible plastic would work.
Cut the side out and bend it around your toll tag. I trimmed mine with scissors and made sure to leave the top exposed to allow the tag to be grabbed easily.

I left the back side lower since I wanted to be able to easily see that the tag is there and also that edge will determine where it sits on the bracket. I tried to get some nice corners by bending over the edge of the bench, but it only worked so-so. A little curve seems to be fine though.
In restrospect, I should have left the front taller to completely cover the tag, after installing, it doesn’t need the clearance there. Have to save that for v2.0.

Next I found some nice wide electrical tape and wrapped it carefully around the whole thing to form the pocket.

You want to keep it nice and tight as friction and gravity are the only things holding the tag in. Also be sure and get a wrap around above the thickest part of the tag, this pulls it in a bit above that ridge and makes it more secure. Try to be neat, but a few wrinkles or bubbles won’t be a big deal.
Optionally, cut a couple of thin strips of tape to cover the exposed adhesive on the inside of the pocket.

Finally, make a couple of slits in the bottom of the pocket, right at the back. Slip a couple of black 8″ cable ties down inside the pocket and out through the slits. Take the windscreen off and run the ties back around the windscreen bracket and tighten them up. Use pliers to get them nice and tight as that makes them lay flat.

Snip off the tails and put the windscreen back on and you’re all set!
So a piece of black plastic, Some electrical tape, and 2 cable ties; not quite free, but pretty damn close!

I’ve used it a few times, and it’s quite secure and reads just fine. It might not hold up to severe jostling like you might find off-road. Other than my driveway, I don’t plan on much of that.

Just picked up a “new” bike. A 2007 Vstrom 650 with 1200 miles. It’s basically brand new and even has an extended warranty. So far I’m very happy with it, it’s a lot like the BMW F650 (which will be up for sale soon). The V-twin makes a bit more power and does it more smoothly than the single in the F650. The fuel injection means no more fussing with a choke, yes it seems I have gotten that lazy. It sure nice to have things like a fuel gauge too. Being built in lawyer times, the thing has about a dozen warning stickers on it, I’ll have to get rid of those.

Just in case you haven’t heard. I started a new job recently. Still with the same company, just getting back to open-source software development. Specifically working on the SBLIM project. I feel that this is a good move for me as I’m pretty comfortable in that area. I’m certainly a bit rusty in the code-writing department, but it’s like riding a bike…..right?

Oh god, please tell me it’s like riding a bike.

In case you aren’t aware, there is a lunar eclipse this evening. Neat.

Coincidentally (?) there is also an errant satellite that will be shot down during the aforementioned eclipse. Also neat.

I see this going one of 2 ways, either completely uneventfully, or horribly, horribly, wrong.

The former option probably doesn’t require much exposition. Missile, Satellite, Boom. It’s the latter, and far more interesting option that is not quite obvious, so I’ll lay it out for you.

Some aspect of the eclipse will cause the missile to fail to impact the target. It may be that the alignment of the Earth, Sun and Moon causes a slight change in the gravitational field of the Earth that messes up the guidance system, or maybe just a rather important Navy officer gets distracted by the spectacle, not important which. This error causes the missile to continue traveling through space until it finally strikes our poor, defenseless Moon. The resulting explosion is enough to fracture the little planetoid into several chunks. As the eclipse subsides it reveals the shattered Moon to the horrified population of the earth.

Over the course of the next few months, the orbit of our own planet around the Sun is affected by this change. The Earth’s path becomes more elliptical bringing us both closer and farther away from the Sun at the extremes. The result is stifling summer temperatures and brutal winter conditions. Over time, the climate degrades further and further and we are periodically peppered by the smaller chunks of debris from the moon.

Eventually, the increased radiation from the close proximity to the Sun mutates those who spend too much time outside into bloodthirsty zombies (there are always zombies). The population dwindles as more of us become, or are consumed by, these zombies, and the environment becomes increasingly toxic.

Finally, despite the efforts of a plucky oil drilling crew, the largest pieces of the moon come crashing into the Earth, instantly wiping out huge chunks of the remaining populace. This event pushes our orbit even farther out of alignment resulting in complete, yet spectacular, destruction as we collide with Jupiter.

I’m sure everything will be fine, but would it really hurt to just push the missile launch off until tomorrow?