• 08 Mar 2007 /  Doom

    According to this BBC article chimps in Senegal have been observed fashioning branches into spears and using them to hunt with. They go as far as sharpening the sticks with their teeth and removing the bark and side branches.

    I know most of you read this and think “So what? They’re just a bunch of monkeys”. Well, you must understand that this is just the beginning. Don’t forget that many years ago, some enterprising caveman did the same thing, and look where we are now. Soon they’ll figure out the wheel, then fire, all of a sudden they know how to make steel. My biggest monkey concern used to be that an infinite number of them would get together and write Hamlet, now I have to worry about them building an Abrams Tank.

    This especially concerns me as all my apocalyptic home defense plans are based on the very real threat of Zombies, and to a lesser extent, robots (see previous blog entry). Defending against super evolved commando monkeys is an entirely different thing. Most notable is the fact that we live in the woods. This, of course, means lots of trees which are perfect for slowing down large robots or confusing lumbering zombies. But these monkeys live in trees. They’ll be leaping about the treetops dropping grenades that they made this morning on the house, it’ll be a slaughter.

    I’m going to have to make some changes.


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